Today is my anniversary. Yep, 14 years. Some days it seems like it has been forever. Some days I wonder how we've made it this long without killing each other. And some days- on days like today, I have a whole new appreciation of love.
Ya see, love these days doesn't look the same as it did fourteen years ago. Back in the day, I remember celebrating every month, knowing exactly how many months we had been together- sometimes to the day. Tonight, the hubz headed his way to softball with one kid, while I headed the opposite way to baseball with another. We got home, nuked some chicken nuggets and some canned peas because my Mama says ya have to have something green at every meal, and ate on our best plastic plates. We threw the kids in the tub, finally got them down and felt like we were really on our A game because three sets of teeth all got brushed. He wrote out lunch money checks on his couch, and I checked Facebook on mine. He retired to bed, and I'm up blogging to chill out after a long day. He didn't ditch me because he didn't get lucky, and I didn't even attempt it because I had to take an Imodium earlier today and I know that he knows I pooped on a public toilet at the ball field and that would just be gross to him. And that is our life. Romance at its best. Love it or leave it... and every day we make that choice to love it.
And tonight, as I sit back and reflect on years past, I feel sorry for my children. With social media, technology, and Lord knows what else they'll have in the years to come, I wonder if my kids will ever know what it means to long for someone. Like really long for someone- someone who is away at camp with no cell phone, and you can't talk to them for days- and your heart aches. I wonder if my kids will ever know what it feels like to have real life butterflies in their stomach and to get up enough nerve to "ask" someone out or if they will just shoot a text. I wonder if my kids will ever have to really take the time to get to know someone or if they'll know everything from their prospects address to favorite color by internet stalking them beforehand. I wonder if they'll ever know the anticipation of waiting for a phone call to come through- and to stress for ten minutes about what number ring you should pick it up on. I wonder if they'll ever truly "get" the feeling of excitement like I did when I logged in and heard the words, "you've got mail." I wonder if my kids will ever be far enough from a laptop and spend hours on end writing and doodling on a piece of paper what their "married" name would be and perfecting that signature. I wonder if they will ever get the effort it takes to write a note, fold it in the most perfect way, and pass it off to a friend so it gets to that special someone. I wonder what they will make that shows their love instead of a mix tape that took hours on end to track down the perfect songs and recording just right. Hell, I wonder if they'll stress about if it's actually going to happen on a date- ya know- getting to second base... or if they'll have been sent pictures of boobies and butts on snapchat like it's nothing. I wonder if they'll ever play MASH to predict their husband, ever have to worry if their parents are listening in on a phone call, or even if they'll have to wait weeks to get their Homecoming pictures printed or if it will be snapped on a phone.
I wonder.
And then I realize, that I'm pretty sure it's all gonna work out just fine. If you had told my twenty year old engaged self that I would be sitting here dead tired spending my anniversary worrying for my children, looking a hot mess, and not living an all out fairy tale, I would have never believed it. And yet, through it all, this crazy thing called love is pretty freakin' wonderful.
So maybe the best thing to do is just pray we all never lose our sense of wonder so we live to experience the wonderful.
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